Waiting

Waiting is hard.

We’re still in the very early stages of this adoption journey, and I know the wait will just get worse and worse once our paperwork is done. And once we’ve the face of our waiting child. But I’m already pining away, and we don’t even know who that child is yet.

I’m starting to obsess about adoption. I’m preoccupied with thoughts of fundraising, medical terms, how to know when we find the right child, what the next steps are for our home study, how I just want to love our child so much….

I know that the journey is hard. I know that doesn’t end once we bring them home. I know I should be focusing on parenting the child who lives with us, and not worrying over how we will parent a traumatized child.

But, I can’t shake it. I’m consumed by the thought of bringing our son or daughter home. I hate to think that every day that passes is one where they don’t know the love of a family. I know that this time of waiting is important. I know that God is working on our hearts as we wait. And I trust in His timing, but I’d be lying if I sad that knowing that made it all better. It makes it some better, but not a much….

And then I think about our waiting child. How long have they been waiting? I can’t even go there right now, but I just hope and pray that we won’t keep them waiting for too much longer.

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